You got a problem with my techniques? Come at me bro

Is this how you position your fingers for the peace sign?

I usually hold my cello like this; the fingers are poised as such...

And this is how you hug

Can someone come help me? I spilled the paint again...

Is this your hair or mine?

David Byrne is David Byrne in the one-man show "And you may ask yourself, how do I work this:  A David Byrne one-man show."

"I can't seem to find the toggle for the wipers on this invisible car..."

Professor Rip Van Winkle lectures IUPUI students on time management.

My beard in competition with my ideas. Let's see who wins !!

It's like holding a baby, but not too close...

Hey man, do you dig my imaginary harp?

The secret for my perfect beard you ask? Well I brush it 100 times a day! Makes it look glossy.

I'm serious, Brenda! I was BORN with this beard! 

I found the IUPUI dungeon and I swear, the rats were THIS big

I don't care HOW long this game of 'Statues' lasts!  I'm gonna win!

"Yup, every Autumn it turns bright colors and then falls off." 

Now imagine a clump of hair THIS big one day clogging up the sewage pipe that runs through the Archives of our future University Library.