• Winning Entry: "Brylcreem fumes had an almost aphrodisiacal effect on Ruby, turning her usual dour pout into a coquettish smile." - Robert Aull

  • Winning Entry: "Who's having Decaf?" - Debra Kent

  • Winning Entry: "The early Terminators were easy to spot..." - Clarence Brooks

  • Winning Entry: "As Linda was demonstrating cleaning her tongue, she accidentally inventer tongue piercing" - Karen Lee

  • Winning Entry:  “John Miller’s first attempt in the food truck business was a complete disaster.” - Catherine Calac

  • Winning Entry: Peter Promiscuous - "How about now?" Chastity the Clown - "No, that is still bad touch." - Andy Smith

  • Winning Entry: “So...Stevens, what are you going to do with YOUR Brylcreem rebate check??” - Michael Wilkinson

  • Winning Entry: As you can see from this map, we have WAY MORE parking spaces than we will ever need.” - Andy Smith

  • Winning Entry: "A jackhammer? For the School of Dentistry groundbreaking? Of course you realize, in fifty years we are going to be the subject of some wisecracking photo captioning contest!" - Scott Strickler

  • Winning Entry: “Two bits, four bits, six bits, a dollar;  one more girl to break the bone in my collar!” - Robert Aull

  • Winning Entry: “So I says to her, ‘Gertrude, you aren't keepin me from carvin' teeth with the guys, no mam, not this time.’” - Kristi Palmer

  • Winning Entry : “My love for you doth grow, like the flowers from thy head. But dear, forsake the mulch, ere the King may think thee dead.” - Bill Orme